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   Osho Mulla Nasruddin Jokes

  1. Mulla Nasruddin was talking to a man and he said 'My wife has a very bad memory.'
    And the man asked 'Do you mean she forgets everything?'
    Mulla Nasruddin said 'No, she remembers everything!'
     
  2. A man came to Mulla Nasruddin and said 'Nasruddin. have you heard? The great scholar of the town has died and twenty rupees are needed to bury him.'

    Mulla gave him a hundred rupee note and said 'Take it, and while you are doing it, why not bury five? Remember, these scholars are very calculating and cunning people -- bury them as deep as possible, otherwise they will come back. And if you need more money, come to me, don't be shy about it!'
     
  3. Once Mulla Nasruddin didn't go to the office. In the evening he came to see me and he was very happy, because he had slept in bed the whole day -- not a care in the world.

    I asked, "Nasruddin, why have you taken a holiday today?
    He said, "Couldn't help it. I tossed a coin in the morning to see whether to go to the office or not -- if it came down heads I had to go, if it came down tails I could enjoy a holiday."

    So I asked, "It came down tails and you enjoyed a holiday?"
    He said, "Yes, but I had to toss it ten times, then it came to tails."
     
  4. I have heard about Mulla Nasruddin. He took his pay one month and there was a ten-rupee note extra. The accountant must have counted wrongly. But he was happy.

    Next month there was a ten-rupee note missing so he immediately complained. The accountant said, 'Mulla, and what about the other time when I had given you a ten-rupee note more? Then you didn't complain.'

    Mulla said, 'Listen. When a mistake is committed once, it is okay. But when it is committed twice, I complain.'
     
  5. Mulla Nasruddin called his boy because now the time was ripe and things about life had to be told to him. So he told him, "You come with me to my room, I would like to discuss a few facts about life with you. Now you are mature and a few things have to be told to you."

    Mulla was feeling a little nervous -- as every father feels when facts of life have to be told to children. As old, out-dated minds do, he was feeling a little nervous.
    When they went into the room and he closed the door the boy said, "You don't be nervous. Now, what do you want to know? I can tell you, don't be so nervous."
     
  6. Just the other day it happened: Mulla Nasruddin's wife went to see Sona -- you know Sona, the tarot card reader? -- and she came back very much disturbed.
    The future disturbs. Anything about the future disturbs. It is good not to know about the future because once you know anything about the future it starts changing your present, and disturbance arises.

    She was very worried. Mulla Nasruddin asked her, "What is the matter?"
    She said, "I have been to a tarot card reader, a very good woman, and she has said a few things and I am very worried."

    Mulla Nasruddin said, "Don't be worried. Nothing is certain in life so no prediction can be made. I tell you that only fools are certain."
    The wife said, "Are you really certain about that?"
    He said, "Absolutely certain!"
     
  7. Mulla Nasruddin was sitting with one of his photographer friends on a bench in the park, and a negro passed by. Mulla Nasruddin said, "Look! Look! A negative!"
     
  8. One day I asked Mulla Nasruddin, "Your umbrella is so new, so beautiful. When did you purchase it?"
    He said, "It is a miracle, Osho! It is not new, it is at least thirty years old."
    I said, "Thirty years old? It looks so new -- as if it has not been in the rain even a single time!"
    He said, "It is thirty years old, but has been exchanged for many other umbrellas at least a hundred times.Just the other day in the temple again it happened!"
     
  9. There was a case. A woman was suing Mulla Nasruddin. She claimed that her child was Mulla Nasruddin's child. And Mulla was denying vehemently in the court.

    Finally, the judge asked: 'Say only one thing -- did you sleep with this woman, Nasruddin?'

    Nasruddin said: 'No, your honour -- not a wink.'

Osho Mulla Nasruddin Jokes: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12